reanbeanmachine | This has spoilers for tocs 2 end game

You've done things I don't agree with. But I don't think for a second you're anything like the people who hurt you. Come home, please. I'm not moving anyway. so you might as well.

[He's stubborn, and patient, and mostly trying to keep the great amounts of distress he feels from showing, but it's still there, his concern and care for Crow obvious in his expression and voice, the upset he feels at this whole situation and even the relief to see Crow alive, tempered by his anger at how bad Crow looks.]

[He almost does hit Rean. He's not against fighting him, obviously, and he wants through. But after all that's happened he just can't. He missed him too much.

But if he can't kill those people then what does he do with his emotions? They're too much. He gives. He's nust going to sit on the floor.]

...I'm still not pressing charges. It's not their business.

[He doesn't want to be the victim in a trial. Talking to the cops sounds awful.]

Then I will, or Captain Claire will. There's more than enough evidence without you.

[He crouches down, in front of Crow, wanting so badly to just hug him tightly right now. He hasn't even seen the footage Claire recovered, but he's sure it's not good, just from what they learned on their way here.]

Thank you.

[For listening to him. And now... Now he is going to hug Crow, even if Crow doesn't want it.]

I was so scared when you vanished, I'm so glad we found you, I'm sorry it took us so long.

[He definitely doesn't want the hug. As soon as Rean moves in Crow tenses up and leans away. He tries to scoot backwards out of it but failing that he just... freaks out. He can't stand being touched or restrained anymore. His body has gotten too used to pain, so that's what it assumes he should be feeling.

It actually hurts. His attitude flips like a switch -- as soon as Rean touches him Crow starts struggling, shoving at Rean and outright biting any bare skin in range.]

[He doesn't force the hug, letting go as soon as Crow struggles, though he still gets bitten hard enough to bleed. He doesn't care about that at all, it's the fact that Crow went wild and feral just from a hug that has his eyes watering with tears. He hates this. He hates that he wasn't here in time. That bad things happened because he wasn't strong enough.]

I'm sorry.

[He says softly, staying still, watching Crow and wishing he could hug him more, hug the light of mad wildness out of his eyes.]

I won't touch you. But let's go home.

Not. Happening.

[He's so upset it takes effort to think. Partly because of the hug but also because he's mad at himself for looking like a mess in front of Rean, and mostly because he's just terrified and furious at not being allowed to end this his way.]

If you really think I'm going to leave with you like a grateful damsel you're out of your mind! This is my problem. I'm not going to let you humiliate me all over the Imperial Chronicle just so you feel like the good guy.

[He doesn't want it. He'd honestly rather die than cooperate. He just knows there's going to be a reporter outside waiting to capitalize. He knows arresting and trying the culprits would mean Aidios knows how many people seeing the recordings, and public conversation about whether or not Crow deserved it. He also knows he shouldn't have made himself a national villain if he wanted to stay out of the spotlight but it's too late for that now, so he's just going to fight what he can fight. Which right now is Rean.]

[He closes his eyes and takes a steadying breath. Fighting Crow isn't new. He just thought they were done with it. But it's also his own fault for not being there to protect Crow in the first place, and he can't make this mess go away and he also can't let Crow murder anyone when he's managed to get a limited amount of freedom arranged for Crow, with conditions. Saying "I'm stopping you from revenge for your own good" won't go over, but it's the truth.]

If you think I'm doing this for fame than you don't know me at all.

Whether you like it or not, your problems are my problems. They're Class VII's problems. So we're going to get you out of here and work on this together.

If you have something you want to do that I can help you with, I will, but I can't let you murder anyone, no matter how much they may deserve it.

Yeah, sure, whatever.

[If he keeps lashing out at Rean then he doesn't have to lash out at himself, so, y'know, this is obviously the right course of action. He's also getting back up off the floor because he feels small there and he wants to be taller than Rean right now.]

I don't think you wanna be famous. You just want to think you did the right thing. But I've got news for you, helping the RMP pursue this isn't that. I'll stand down if I have to but if you leave it in their hands I'll never forgive you.

[It's not even about the murder, really. He definitely wants to murder but what's more important is not being exposed. Crow honestly couldn't make himself stand under that magnifying glass if he wanted to, now. He's so scared of it he's shaking, just at the idea of seeing a camera.]

Then what do you want me to do?

[He can't let Crow take this into his own hands and hushing things up is not even in Rean's top ten list of "things I think about" so he's at a slight loss as to how he's supposed to approach this. The threat of never being forgiven isn't the problem either, because if Crow wouldn't forgive him, that would hurt forever, but he'd still stick to his principles to keep Crow safe.

But even standing and angry Crow looks beaten down and scared and Rean wants to help, he just doesn't know how.]

[He should believe that Rean will do what he asks, if it's not ridiculous. He really should, and part of him does, but he's so keyed up and scared and angry it's hard to get it together enough to just say what he wants. It's like even admitting what the problem is is going to bring something down on his head.]

I want--

[Hm. It seems the words are stuck. He has to stop and breathe, slowly, to keep himself from hyperventilating. There's a voice in the back of his head, echoing "What do you want?", and actually the answer is the same as it's been the whole time. He wants to stop feeling horrible. He can't do that, but at least he can keep himself from crying when no one's even touching him.]

...Tell them to drop it. Let the bastards go, I don't care. Just drop the case and give me back the evidence.

[He's kind of shocked but on the other hand this is better than "let me murder them all" so he rakes his fingers through his hair and nods.]

I'll see what I can do.

[Which is Rean for "if it's at all remotely possible I'll make sure it happens" but you know. He'll do his best. He doesn't know if the RMP will listen but he thinks Claire will, so he has high hopes he can give Crow what he wants. Not this second, the men are already being taken into custody and the evidence is already being bundled away and Crow needs a doctor or someone to look at his injuries. But he'll see to it, he has that determined look.]

Is there anything else?

Yeah. I'm not going out there if there's press. Tell them to fuck off. And confiscate the photos.

["Covering it up" is absolutely what he's going for right now. He wants this whole thing gone under the table. If he could make everyone here forget about it he would.]

I don't want to see a word about this getting out. Anywhere.

[He's looking at Crow with deep concern but if this is the way to keep him from freaking out he'll go along for now.]

Okay. I'll talk to people about keeping this quiet.

[Crow really doesn't appreciate that concerned look. It's reasonable but he hates that he's being looked at like there's something wrong with him. He doesn't want to be cared about. He just wants to be away from people.]

Good. Go do it and leave me alone.

[He takes a deep breath, standing straighter.]

I'll see you in a bit.

[He'll do what he said, talk to everyone. And it doesn't matter if Crow waits or tries to leave, without a member of Class VII with him the RMP won't let him go.

Because Rean is himself he talks to Claire and Norton and explains what he understands, asking the press to leave this alone for his own sake, and for Claire to return the evidence to Crow. Neither are happy, Norton hates the idea of more media coverups but Rean's sincerity convinces him to let this go just once. Claire is harder, she eventually agrees to keep the men detained and review the recordings alone before she makes a final decision. That will have to be good enough for now, and Rean goes to find Crow to tell him the good and bad news.]

[By the time Rean gets back Crow has already gotten into trouble. He absolutely tried to wander off, because frankly he has never liked the RMP and doesn't want to be anywhere near them. Of course they tried to ask him to not do that but he ignored them so Dominique put a hand on his shoulder and found out adrenaline does a lot for a guy. Beaten up and weak or not he threw the poor girl and started a scuffle that's ended in a couple of RMP officers with bruises and Crow sitting against the wall with his hands cuffed behind his back, trying not to scream. Anymore, anyway. He did a lot of screaming when they were trying to wrangle him.

He just wants to be alone. He wants to disappear somewhere and not be touched or looked at ever again. The cuffs feel like they're cutting (he's not sure if it's psychological or if his nerves are just permanently on overdrive now) and the officers' gazes feel like they're burning a hole through him. To avoid an even more embarrassing fit of hysterics he's outwardly disconnecting. Inside he's climbing the walls, but outside the only clue is the uneven, rough quality of his breath. His expression is blank and he's not moving. Just staring at the opposite wall and fantasizing about shoving the police, the men who did this, and himself into a room and setting it on fire.]

[He's told what happened as he is shown to where Crow is and he just sighs, holding his hand out for the keys and being given them before he approaches Crow again.]

Hey. Want to lean forward so I can get you out of those?

[Crow's concentrating on being in the same general sphere as calm, so while he does lean forward he doesn't say anything about it. He doesn't look at Rean, either.

He's so mad. At everyone else but also at himself. He's not even sure how long it's been but it feels like he's a different person than he was before, and it's not a person he likes. He doesn't like being so emotional. He doesn't like feeling like he's out of his own control -- he can't make himself stop freaking out for even a minute and that's exhausting. He'd like to stop being angry and scared and wound up but he just can't, and getting frustrated is only making it worse.]

[Rean's focusing on just... Not freaking out himself. Honestly he has Crow, alive, and maybe really badly harmed, but alive, so the rest can be worked out somehow. He unlocks the cuffs and tosses them down, stepping back to give Crow space.]

So I have good news and maybe good news. The press won't report on this. And Captain Claire's agreed not to permit anyone else but herself to review the evidence. If she can find a way to indict these guys without dragging you into it she will, and she'll release the footage back to you when she's done.

She's ready to let us go home. But I'd like you to see a doctor, those wounds didn't look great.

It's fine.

[He really really does not want Claire to watch those tapes. BUT he has enough sanity to be able to recognise that only her seeing them is much preferable to lots of people seeing them, and if he doesn't agree to that compromise he won't get his way at all. It'll look suspicious. As if he already isn't a suspicious fucker who's given her a lot of cause to not be generous.

So he'll just skip over that part and worry about the doctor thing. He sits and rubs his wrists for a bit, gingerly -- weird hallucinated extra pain aside they were already horribly bruised and he kind of made it worse being difficult just now. But once he's breathed a little he gets up, pushing his hair out of his face and trying to look put together. He's on the verge of both physical and emotional collapse but showing it won't help him argue this point.]

It's all just superficial. Nothing I can't sleep off.

[Rean's eyes narrow. Yeah. Look he can smell bullshit a mile away thanks to the combined efforts of Crow and Sara so.]

Yeah, no. You're seeing a doctor. I'll call ahead and have Instructor Beatrix meet us.

No.

[Despite himself he says it too forcefully. Too emotionally. He doesn't, in theory, mind having his wounds treated, but in practice he's pretty sure he'll lose it.]

I'm serious. It's all been cleaned and monitored and none of it is serious. I'm just tired.

[That's not even really a lie. They'd made a point not to give any life-threatening injuries, or leave anything to get infected. There's no major internal injuries. No bones that need setting or gashes that need stitching or septic stab wounds. He's just, y'know, covered in bruises and small cuts and burns from head to toe and all. Sure he's got some minor fractures, and he hasn't eaten enough in six weeks, and he probably got a concussion a couple of times that haven't totally healed, and just about everything is sprained from all the convulsing and he has no idea what damage those drugs caused and he needs to get tested for STIs but-- he's fine. It can all be taken care of with a first aid kit and a nap.

He'd rather take the risk of not having it looked at than face the absolute certainty that being examined is going to send him off the panic deep end.]

Great, then I'm sure it won't take the Instructor long to treat you.

[Sorry but this is non-negotiable, Rean's already decided. He'll compromise on what Crow needs for his sanity, hushing this up, giving the RMP unreasonable demands, but he's not giving an inch if it comes to Crow's health, so if Crow wants to fight him that's fine.]

Anyway, I want to get out of this place, how about you?

...Fine.

[Maybe he'll just try to book it once they're away from the police? Yes. Good plan. Rean knows him pretty well though so he can probably see the gears turning, or at the very least that Crow is very very much not actually chilling out at all.]

[He can see as plain as day that Crow isn't fine, and also still has his jacket, but he's leading the way up to the exit. They're getting a police escort back to Trista for courtesy anyway, and Rean takes the time to talk quietly with the class and see that Instructor Beatrix will be back at the dorms waiting.

And then he sits with Crow while Dominique explains to Crow what Rean already knows. Crow is free to roam around Trista but if he leaves without a member of the class he'll be arrested. Other than that his status is sort of up the air right now. Millium will be the one overseeing keeping an eye on him, but it seems like for now he should just get some rest.]

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