Rean Schwarzer (
reanbeanmachine) wrote2018-06-21 02:55 am
spoilery
[It's been 5 months since the operation in Heimdallr. It's May, and the Lino flowers have come and gone in Trista.
But Rean Schwarzer, Ashen Chevalier and Hero of Erebonia is not in Trista. His class has graduated and he's on academic leave. He's been here for three months or so, fighting the Empire's battles so the soldiers don't have to, discouraging Calvard from any real large-scale operations, and in his limited down-time, letting Lechter drag him around.
He's been going through the motions for months now, tired but pressing on. He had a week of for Class VII's graduation and then he himself was back to the front. No down time, no closure.
He doesn't think what he's doing is right, but it's also not exactly wrong. Yet every day leaves his heart heavy and weary and conflicted, his mind going round and round in uncertain circles, and that's when he's feeling energetic. A lot of the time he's still on a bit of shut-down. Emotionally, especially. He smiles when he should and he genuinely cares, especially about Altina and Millium when they're with him, but he hasn't had time to mourn, and his grief and anger have to be buried under getting the job done. Rather than physically worn down he's been emotionally fatigued for months, and being part of his father's grand plan to subjugate Crossbell really does nothing to help, but at least it keeps him occupied. Occupied, and away from almost everyone who'd have a prayer of bringing his spirits up. Even Millium doesn't really understand, sadness is too new for her, though she tries.
And while Rean is tired and fighting under the banner of the noble hero, Crow is undergoing his own little fun time. That is to say, his revival is a success, but not entirely. He's not very controllable, you see, because his memories are intact, though it takes a month or two for the pieces of them to fall fully in place. Still, somehow, his return the world is noticed by Ordine, and from Ordine Vita learns of it. After that it's only a matter of time before he's with the Anguis and not the organization who had hoped to use him. And with Vita he can catch up on everything he's missed in the months he's been dead and re-animated.
Which is presumably why he's now in Crossbell, sneaking into the room Rean's been given. It's a nice private officer's quarters, even if he's still technically a student, because the Ashen Chevalier isn't going to be bunked up in the barracks.
It's late, but someone is in the room with Rean, talking to him, when Crow arrives to listen in from whatever approach he's taken, probably air ducts. Claire, actually. She sounds worried, and Rean sounds testy, it's the end of a conversation Crow catches.]
But the Chancellor... No, your father, I'm sure--
That's enough. I'm tired.
....Then, goodnight.
[Whatever they were discussing is impossible to say but when the door closes behind Claire Rean sighs heavily, and there's the sound of him flopping onto bed. Unfortunately he doesn't narrate whatever internal monologue he's having aloud for Crow's benefit at this point.]
But Rean Schwarzer, Ashen Chevalier and Hero of Erebonia is not in Trista. His class has graduated and he's on academic leave. He's been here for three months or so, fighting the Empire's battles so the soldiers don't have to, discouraging Calvard from any real large-scale operations, and in his limited down-time, letting Lechter drag him around.
He's been going through the motions for months now, tired but pressing on. He had a week of for Class VII's graduation and then he himself was back to the front. No down time, no closure.
He doesn't think what he's doing is right, but it's also not exactly wrong. Yet every day leaves his heart heavy and weary and conflicted, his mind going round and round in uncertain circles, and that's when he's feeling energetic. A lot of the time he's still on a bit of shut-down. Emotionally, especially. He smiles when he should and he genuinely cares, especially about Altina and Millium when they're with him, but he hasn't had time to mourn, and his grief and anger have to be buried under getting the job done. Rather than physically worn down he's been emotionally fatigued for months, and being part of his father's grand plan to subjugate Crossbell really does nothing to help, but at least it keeps him occupied. Occupied, and away from almost everyone who'd have a prayer of bringing his spirits up. Even Millium doesn't really understand, sadness is too new for her, though she tries.
And while Rean is tired and fighting under the banner of the noble hero, Crow is undergoing his own little fun time. That is to say, his revival is a success, but not entirely. He's not very controllable, you see, because his memories are intact, though it takes a month or two for the pieces of them to fall fully in place. Still, somehow, his return the world is noticed by Ordine, and from Ordine Vita learns of it. After that it's only a matter of time before he's with the Anguis and not the organization who had hoped to use him. And with Vita he can catch up on everything he's missed in the months he's been dead and re-animated.
Which is presumably why he's now in Crossbell, sneaking into the room Rean's been given. It's a nice private officer's quarters, even if he's still technically a student, because the Ashen Chevalier isn't going to be bunked up in the barracks.
It's late, but someone is in the room with Rean, talking to him, when Crow arrives to listen in from whatever approach he's taken, probably air ducts. Claire, actually. She sounds worried, and Rean sounds testy, it's the end of a conversation Crow catches.]
But the Chancellor... No, your father, I'm sure--
That's enough. I'm tired.
....Then, goodnight.
[Whatever they were discussing is impossible to say but when the door closes behind Claire Rean sighs heavily, and there's the sound of him flopping onto bed. Unfortunately he doesn't narrate whatever internal monologue he's having aloud for Crow's benefit at this point.]

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You're here, that's all that matters.
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[Rean may not realise it but he's a top priority. He's also getting flopped on aggressively.]
I can't stay, but they'd have to have killed me again to stop me from checking on you.
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[His fingers tighten on Crow's shirt and he is just glad to be flopped on.]
Who's after you? Whoever they are we can fight them together.
[HE DOESN'T WANT TO LET CROW VANISH AGAIN?]
I'm not letting you go again.
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[Answering that question totally honestly is just opening some serious cans of worms. So he's going to skirt it.]
It's the Imperial government, man. It's not that easy.
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[He shouldn't be shocked but still he kind of is? But then who else would have access to Crow's body.]
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[So really it's extremely dangerous for Crow to be in this building.]
I'll be worse than dead if they catch me. I just wanted to see you, is all.
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I don't even know what to say about your recklessness... Except... Thank you.
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[He's gay Rean.]
If I had my way I'd kidnap you.
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[He's really emotional but apparently they have to work out complicated things. Ugh. Why can't he just sit here and cry on Crow a while more.]
I guess we should figure out what to do from here.
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[He can pat Rean's butt though. It's okay Rean cheer up we're just on opposite sides again!]
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That's sexual harassment.
[He echoes Crow's complaints to Angie before the festival.]
Seriously. We need to figure out what to do.
[Sorry Crow that went over his head.]
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[Pat pat pat.]
You should consider running away with me though.
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Crow...
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[About the flirting and the running away.]
Osborne's bad news. I don't want you fighting me on that crusty bastard's orders. And honestly I just want you with me.
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I wouldn't fight you if he ordered me to anyway. I already beat you, I don't see any reason to fight you from now on. You should have come home with us, instead you...
[He has to take a breath and it's a little shaky.]
I'm glad you're here now. I really don't understand what's going on but I don't intend to fight you again. I'm not sure how we'll figure things out if he's behind this and after you but I don't want to run from it.
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[It is the opposite of smart, as Crow knows better than most.]
I really can't stay and deliberate, though.
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[He doesn't care about smart. He's been helping the Intelligence Division because it's, as best he can tell, the best way to save lives from unnecessarily prolonged conflict, and so in that way it's what's right, but he's not unconflicted about it. There's a lot he doesn't agree with with all of this.]
I want to know what's going on, and I want to stay with you. A lot's happened, and I can't really say I can drag you back to Class VII at this point, but I can't just let you vanish knowing you're alive.
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[Crow's just gonna mash Rean's cheeks now. Despite the seriousness of the situation, he really wants to keep touching him. Like, a lot.]
You won already. I'm on your side. So if you're not ready to go with me now, Vita will make sure you can contact me.
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I'm not going to sneak away right now, I'll just tell them I quit. And then--actually and then what?
[What are we doing about things? What things need things done about them? He's on board but he doesn't even know what type of ship it is let alone the destination.]
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[Duh. Rean already knows Crow has a very specific desire. He's dead serious about that, too, in contrast to their stupid cheek-bullying.]
I might start here in Crossbell.
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[The Rean Method; Talk About It A Lot.
He's still upset about the chancellor, and the futility of Crow's last plan, the way they all played into his father's hands. It bothers him deeply and he doesn't think anything good will happen if they rush into things now. He has a lot of complicated feelings and he's really, really tired.]
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He's still going to sulk about it though.]
If you can come up with a casualty-free way of taking out a corrupt government, I'll try it.
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[Sorry Rean is always so reasonable about shit even when he's tired and traumatized.]
I know how to contact Emma easily without being suspected but what about you and Vita? For that matter, even if I quit right now we're going to have to set up somewhere to go.
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[mumblemumble witch things]
Are you sure you don't want to run away right now? It'd be romantic.
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[That awkward "right you're messing with me again" laugh. He's perfected it so well with the people in his life.
Honestly he's such a mess of emotions but it feels nice to be teased like this, like things are normal and okay because they haven't been for a long time now and even if the source of a lot of his trauma was not being able to save Crow and now Crow is right here and he feels so much better, it doesn't erase months of being sort of dead inside either. But Rean's the type of guy who just keeps on regardless of how he feels, even if right now he just wants to curl around Crow spend another five hours crying and talking and then walk out of here together without hiding and gather all their friends.
But that's not to be so he's falling into his practical mode.]
I definitely don't want to see you go, but it'd cause a lot more of a ruckus if I just vanished in the night. I'll quit properly, and get in contact with everyone. If we're avoiding suspicion I think inviting everyone to a weekend in Ymir would make the most sense. I can try to arrange it for the end of the month and meet you there in a week. I doubt anyone is going to think much of me needing a break at this point.
[Though being himself and so straight-laced he's going to feel bad leaving so abruptly anyway.]
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