reanbeanmachine | spoilery

spoilery

[It's been 5 months since the operation in Heimdallr. It's May, and the Lino flowers have come and gone in Trista.

But Rean Schwarzer, Ashen Chevalier and Hero of Erebonia is not in Trista. His class has graduated and he's on academic leave. He's been here for three months or so, fighting the Empire's battles so the soldiers don't have to, discouraging Calvard from any real large-scale operations, and in his limited down-time, letting Lechter drag him around.

He's been going through the motions for months now, tired but pressing on. He had a week of for Class VII's graduation and then he himself was back to the front. No down time, no closure.

He doesn't think what he's doing is right, but it's also not exactly wrong. Yet every day leaves his heart heavy and weary and conflicted, his mind going round and round in uncertain circles, and that's when he's feeling energetic. A lot of the time he's still on a bit of shut-down. Emotionally, especially. He smiles when he should and he genuinely cares, especially about Altina and Millium when they're with him, but he hasn't had time to mourn, and his grief and anger have to be buried under getting the job done. Rather than physically worn down he's been emotionally fatigued for months, and being part of his father's grand plan to subjugate Crossbell really does nothing to help, but at least it keeps him occupied. Occupied, and away from almost everyone who'd have a prayer of bringing his spirits up. Even Millium doesn't really understand, sadness is too new for her, though she tries.

And while Rean is tired and fighting under the banner of the noble hero, Crow is undergoing his own little fun time. That is to say, his revival is a success, but not entirely. He's not very controllable, you see, because his memories are intact, though it takes a month or two for the pieces of them to fall fully in place. Still, somehow, his return the world is noticed by Ordine, and from Ordine Vita learns of it. After that it's only a matter of time before he's with the Anguis and not the organization who had hoped to use him. And with Vita he can catch up on everything he's missed in the months he's been dead and re-animated.

Which is presumably why he's now in Crossbell, sneaking into the room Rean's been given. It's a nice private officer's quarters, even if he's still technically a student, because the Ashen Chevalier isn't going to be bunked up in the barracks.

It's late, but someone is in the room with Rean, talking to him, when Crow arrives to listen in from whatever approach he's taken, probably air ducts. Claire, actually. She sounds worried, and Rean sounds testy, it's the end of a conversation Crow catches.]

But the Chancellor... No, your father, I'm sure--

That's enough. I'm tired.

....Then, goodnight.

[Whatever they were discussing is impossible to say but when the door closes behind Claire Rean sighs heavily, and there's the sound of him flopping onto bed. Unfortunately he doesn't narrate whatever internal monologue he's having aloud for Crow's benefit at this point.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He makes a yelping noise than covers his mouth his his hand, hoping that wasn't too loud. But what the heck, Crow??? This must be some new way of bullying.]

That's sexual harassment.

[He echoes Crow's complaints to Angie before the festival.]

Seriously. We need to figure out what to do.

[Sorry Crow that went over his head.]

It's called flirting.

[Pat pat pat.]

You should consider running away with me though.

[He reaches to catch Crow's very offending hand??? His dearest friend is back from the dead and patting his butt what does he do with this situation?]

Crow...

I'm serious.

[About the flirting and the running away.]

Osborne's bad news. I don't want you fighting me on that crusty bastard's orders. And honestly I just want you with me.

[He takes him seriously about the running away at least.]

I wouldn't fight you if he ordered me to anyway. I already beat you, I don't see any reason to fight you from now on. You should have come home with us, instead you...

[He has to take a breath and it's a little shaky.]

I'm glad you're here now. I really don't understand what's going on but I don't intend to fight you again. I'm not sure how we'll figure things out if he's behind this and after you but I don't want to run from it.

You should think about it hard. Making an enemy of him isn't actually smart.

[It is the opposite of smart, as Crow knows better than most.]

I really can't stay and deliberate, though.

I don't really care.

[He doesn't care about smart. He's been helping the Intelligence Division because it's, as best he can tell, the best way to save lives from unnecessarily prolonged conflict, and so in that way it's what's right, but he's not unconflicted about it. There's a lot he doesn't agree with with all of this.]

I want to know what's going on, and I want to stay with you. A lot's happened, and I can't really say I can drag you back to Class VII at this point, but I can't just let you vanish knowing you're alive.

I'm not gonna vanish. Jeez.

[Crow's just gonna mash Rean's cheeks now. Despite the seriousness of the situation, he really wants to keep touching him. Like, a lot.]

You won already. I'm on your side. So if you're not ready to go with me now, Vita will make sure you can contact me.

[Not his cheeks? He looks startled and then tugs at Crow's cheeks. Honestly he might start crying again he's so happy. Despite things being bad.]

I'm not going to sneak away right now, I'll just tell them I quit. And then--actually and then what?

[What are we doing about things? What things need things done about them? He's on board but he doesn't even know what type of ship it is let alone the destination.]

Rebellion.

[Duh. Rean already knows Crow has a very specific desire. He's dead serious about that, too, in contrast to their stupid cheek-bullying.]

I might start here in Crossbell.

Can we do something less drastic and likely to lead to casualties? Or at least... We should get everyone together and talk over the options.

[The Rean Method; Talk About It A Lot.

He's still upset about the chancellor, and the futility of Crow's last plan, the way they all played into his father's hands. It bothers him deeply and he doesn't think anything good will happen if they rush into things now. He has a lot of complicated feelings and he's really, really tired.]

[UGH Rean! Always with the talking, and the worrying about casualties. But he did beat Crow, and Crow did agree to rejoin the group. That prooobably means listening to Rean's way of doing things.

He's still going to sulk about it though.]

If you can come up with a casualty-free way of taking out a corrupt government, I'll try it.

Okay, I don't have any ideas yet but we'll get everyone together and see what we come up with.

[Sorry Rean is always so reasonable about shit even when he's tired and traumatized.]

I know how to contact Emma easily without being suspected but what about you and Vita? For that matter, even if I quit right now we're going to have to set up somewhere to go.

If it's for us, just start talking. She has her ways, y'know.

[mumblemumble witch things]

Are you sure you don't want to run away right now? It'd be romantic.

Haha...

[That awkward "right you're messing with me again" laugh. He's perfected it so well with the people in his life.

Honestly he's such a mess of emotions but it feels nice to be teased like this, like things are normal and okay because they haven't been for a long time now and even if the source of a lot of his trauma was not being able to save Crow and now Crow is right here and he feels so much better, it doesn't erase months of being sort of dead inside either. But Rean's the type of guy who just keeps on regardless of how he feels, even if right now he just wants to curl around Crow spend another five hours crying and talking and then walk out of here together without hiding and gather all their friends.

But that's not to be so he's falling into his practical mode.]

I definitely don't want to see you go, but it'd cause a lot more of a ruckus if I just vanished in the night. I'll quit properly, and get in contact with everyone. If we're avoiding suspicion I think inviting everyone to a weekend in Ymir would make the most sense. I can try to arrange it for the end of the month and meet you there in a week. I doubt anyone is going to think much of me needing a break at this point.

[Though being himself and so straight-laced he's going to feel bad leaving so abruptly anyway.]

That's true. You do overwork yourself.

[He stares for a moment, quietly, brushing Rean's hair away from his face. Should he keep it to himself...? Nah. He's been trying to make himself clear and it hasn't ruined anything yet so:]

I know something that'll help.

Hm?

[He is clueless okay. Even if he weren't having an emotional meltdown of the good kind he'd be clueless. But especially right now he's so overwhelmed, even if he is trying to be calm and practical.]

If you're going to say something illegal...

Not as such. Unless you count fraternizing with the enemy.

[He's not being bad. He's just leaning in for a kiss.]

Frat--

[He doesn't finish the surprised response because now he's being kissed and his mind is going blank again. Look he was already overloaded, this is just too much to process. His eyes go wide but notably he's not reacting badly. He's just shocked.]

[Crow doesn't drag out the kiss, but it's passionate while it lasts. He's rolling them too, so he's straddling Rean's hips and looking down at him with a smug grin.]

I was thinking I should give you a good memory to tide you over.

[He doesn't have time to react properly... He's just starting to return the kiss and then Crow's on his lap and he's blinking up at Crow in continued wide-eyed shock.

His brain is white noise. It's not bad but it's inhibiting his ability to process... Anything. He can't think because his emotions are overwhelming but he can't even manage to tell what his emotions are because he can't think. His heart might hammer out of his chest.]

Crow...?

I told you I was serious.

[He looks more giddy than serious, though, catching Rean's hands in his and pinning him, with their fingers tangled.]

I don't know how much time we have, this time, so I'm not going to waste it.

[On the contrary he's going to kiss Rean again, this time much more thoroughly. Rean's obviously shocked but that's okay. Crow trusts he'll say no if he's unhappy.]

[Crow pinning him has his heart racing even faster, if that's possible. And he's not, you know, without any libido, the kissing and the position and the overwhelmed feelings are definitely getting his body to react. And it's not like his heart isn't all there too, now that it's being pointed out to him.

His fingers curl against Crow's, not pressing him back but holding on, tilting his head up to kiss Crow in return while he succumbs, a little, to what his heart is aching for. He's starting to cry again too, because he's a baby and he has a lot of emotions and he hasn't had time to start sorting even a fraction of them out and Crow is dragging more into the mix.

He has to turn his head and gasp for air in the kiss, making another little sobbing noise as he catches his breath. In his own head he's not sad or upset at all, he's just overwhelmed but the tears and the holding on to Crow's hands may be kind of mixed signals from an outside perspective.]

[It's a little worrying but Crow knows Rean, so only a little. He gives Rean a moment to breathe though, squeezing his hands gently and smiling down at him with swollen lips.]

Hope those are happy tears.

[He swallows heavily, unable to take his eyes off Crow. His cheeks are red and he can't keep his gaze off Crow's lips or you know, eyes, any part of his face, which is very close and very real and most importantly animated and very alive.

He's dying here.]

Of course they are.

[He whispers, really choked up. He should be sorting out his thoughts but Crow ambushed him, is, as usual, way ahead. He actually starts to laugh, a bit wet with the whole crying thing.]

Even when you die and come back you're ahead of me. How am I ever supposed to catch up?

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